Chapter 9 - Final Chapter

That night, I went home and drank the entire bottle of Dom Perignon that I’d been saving for me and Courtney’s anniversary. The crisp champagne that was supposed to represent a fantastic time in my life tasted like death.

Sitting at my desk, I pulled out the drawer. Taped to the desk, hidden where no one could see it, was a coke stash I had in case of emergency. I frantically tore at the plastic holding it together, desperate for a hit, followed by another and another. My hands were shaking as I realized what I was trying to do, my whole body jittery. I was sure this time. I wanted to be free.

I reached for a pen and paper. The ink came out jagged and sloppy, but legible enough to get the point across.

”To anyone,
I tried to be a big shot but as soon as I realized what I was dealing with, I couldn’t cope. This type of pressure is the kind to split families in two and put people on the streets. I’ve seen both firsthand and-”

My handwriting continued to get worse, as I scrambled to write down all of my thoughts.

“-the world is too heartbreaking for me to continue.”

I quickly scribbled out who I wanted my money to go to. Not the record company. I couldn’t let it all go to the same people who drove me to this point. I left some for Courtney and the girls, for Stan, and for John. Part of me wanted to leave something inspirational like a note, to give people hope, but I knew it would get overshadowed by the fact that I had killed myself, especially through the use of drugs.

Reaching underneath the drawer on the other side of my desk, I found where I kept the good stuff. The same type of heroin I overdosed on in New York. This time, I would finish the job. After preparing the dosage and injecting it, I laid in bed. A smile appeared on my face as I stared at the ceiling. I mustered up the strength to call my manager.

“Hello? I’m in a meeting. What do you want?” He barked over the speaker.

“I fucking quit.” I said. He started yelling on the other end. “Maybe you’ll get a replacement. There’s plenty like me to be found...” My voice trailed off, phone sliding out of my hand and down to the hardwood floor.

My head rolled to the side. I lost consciousness, my heartbeat and breathing slowing until finally, I took my last breath. My manager contacted the paramedics, but despite their best efforts, there was no reviving me. It was done. I had finally made my own decision after years of being commandeered by the powers that be. Feeling myself slowly slipping away was liberating.

My body was mine again.

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Thank you for following along with this series. For a full list of pop culture references in the chapters, click [a= http://3dspaint.com/blog/?id=98664 ]here[/a]. I won’t say which ending is the true ending, that’s up to you guys. I hope you enjoyed the series. I enjoyed writing it. Maybe there will be more to come.